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Red Willow Counseling & Recovery

Red Willow counseling and Recovery

Therapy: 385-313-0055

IOP: 385-202-5315

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Therapy: 385-313-0055

IOP: 385-202-5315

Coping With LGBTQI+ Discrimination And Microaggressions

Home | LGBTQ+ or Gender Issues

LGBTQ+ Issuses Salt Lake City, UT
Dealing with LGBTQIA+ microaggressions

A large percentage of LGBTQI+ individuals continue to experience discrimination in their everyday lives. Discrimination and microaggressions can affect mental health, emotional well-being, self-confidence, and much more. More than 1 in 3 adults reported facing some kind of discrimination in the past year, according to American Progress. Here are some of the top coping methods we recommend to aid in dealing with discrimination.

While discrimination and hate are not ok, we know that progress takes some time. While society learns more about LGBTQI+ individuals, here are some ways you can seek help and support yourself. 

Join LGBTQI+ Communities

Engaging with support groups can provide you with a safe space to share your experiences. Peer groups give you a place of shared experiences, belonging, and validation. Many Facebook groups and community organizations will support your gender identity or your journey to discovering where you fit in the community. 

Finding friends who will advocate for you is also a great way to limit discrimination in your everyday life. A group of allies who support your identity won’t say microaggressions or phrases that may be offensive. Finding a supportive group can be difficult for an LGBTQI+ person, especially when there is still so much unknown about the queer community. This is why community groups and online platforms are so crucial for queer people.

Challenge Microaggressions

When you feel safe, you can calmly educate others on the impact microaggressions can have on people. Challenging misconceptions, hate speech, and microaggressions can be very difficult, especially as you are trying to navigate changes yourself. Educate your family, friends, co-workers, and classmates as you learn new information. Share resources with them to help all of you better understand LGBTQI+ issues. 

While education and advocating are important, sometimes walking away from a situation is best. When someone is unwilling to listen, the best thing to do is remove yourself from a situation to protect your peace. In the stress of discrimination, it can be hard to walk away and let the person continue to use that language. However, keeping yourself safe is always more important. 

Set Clear Boundaries

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Before interacting with new people, or even those who may not fully support your identity or sexual orientation, you should set clear boundaries. Communicating when someone crosses your boundaries will help others learn what is appropriate to say. Practice phrases like “I feel uncomfortable when you say that” or “I prefer to be called _____.” Boundaries are important for all people, setting them helps improve communication between people and protect your mental stamina. 

Seek Therapy

Conversing with a therapist who understands the struggles of LGBTQI+ people can help make your self-discovery journey easier. Learning about your gender identity, and sexual orientation, losing friends, facing the judgment of family, and dating new people can all be hard to navigate on your own. 

Our therapists at Red Willow will listen to your concerns and provide you with resources to help you in daily life. Therapists can help you work through issues like body or gender dysphoria, grief from losing family or friend support, and more. 

Utilize Positive Affirmations

Doubting yourself can be a result of discrimination and microaggressions. Living a full life can be difficult when others constantly judge you. Affirming your worth will help LGBTQI+ individuals have more self-confidence to navigate the world. Utilize positive affirmations to help you feel empowered. Some affirmations you can try include:

  • My identity is beautiful, and I embrace it fully
  • I deserve happiness, love, and acceptance in all areas of my life
  • I release any fear or shame and embrace my true self with pride
  • I am not alone; I am part of a vibrant and supportive community
  • I embrace my journey and the progress I’ve made
  • I stand in my truth, confident and unafraid
  • My voice matters, and I have the power to create positive change

Advocate For Change

Engaging in your community to advocate for others is a way to combat discrimination and microaggressions. Being an activist can give other LGBTQI+ individuals hope for the future. Get involved in Pride, marches, tabling at local events, your college’s diversity center, or start a club. Making a change for others around you will limit future discrimination not only for you but for generations after. 

Educate Yourself

Even though you are a part of the community, you can continue to learn more about LGBTQI+ issues. Staying educated on these issues will help you continue to make a difference in your community. When a new language emerges or when an aggression has occurred to a specific group, make sure you read or research any information that you can access. 

LGBTQI+ Therapy From Red Willow

LGBTQ+ Issues Salt Lake City Utah Queer and LGBTQIA mental health

Gender identity and sexual orientation can be a cause of distress for teens and adults. Red Willow has many resources for LGBTQI+ individuals to help them navigate trauma, bullying, dating, or microaggressions. We want to help you live a life of intention, one where you don’t have to worry about the judgment of others. Working with our providers can help you develop coping skills, process trauma, and navigate harmful words spoken by others. Reach out to either our Salt Lake City or Park City locations to get started today!

Filed Under: LGBTQ+ or Gender Issues

Although Salt Lake City has a lot of spaces that are genuinely queer-friendly, the possibility of finding yourself somewhere unsafe (emotionally or physically) is high enough that you may hesitate to do everything you want to. As a pansexual, polyamorous, ex-Mormon in Utah, finding people (including therapists) who understand me has been very hit or miss.

I have had people tell me that my mental health issues are a result of me “choosing” these identities. I recently had someone tell me that queer folks are doomed to be risk-taking addicts. We are all familiar with the microaggressions and ignorance around us, but how can we know if a place will be likely to hurt us or welcome us with open arms?  

LGBTQ+ And Queer Mental Health Resources From Red Willow

LGBTQ+ Issues Salt Lake City Utah
Queer and LGBTQIA mental health

Beyond the pride flags in our windows, Red Willow therapists of varying genders and sexual orientations work hard to ensure that our clients are seen as complex human beings, not stereotypes. You should not have to educate your therapist about queer issues, and you definitely should not feel judged for any aspect of who you are. Therapy is about feeling safe enough to work through difficult things with someone who can guide and hold that experience with you. 

A few of my favorite treatment modalities to use with my queer clients (and in my own therapy sessions as a queer client) include CBT, DBT, and EMDR. 

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can help people see the relationships between thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Once you have more awareness of each of those, you can practice challenging those thoughts and see how it affects the rest of the chain.

For example: 

Thoughts: “I don’t belong anywhere.”

Emotions: Loneliness, shame, anger, sadness

Behaviors: Socially isolate, mask my true self, walk on eggshells

With some cognitive flexibility, we can find cognitions that are more helpful, such as, “I can make meaningful connections with people.” This thought might help us feel more hopeful and confident, which helps us be more socially active, authentic, and open.

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) helps folks learn skills for emotional regulation, distress tolerance, mindfulness, and interpersonal effectiveness. Several of my queer clients were told from a young age that they were “too sensitive” or “overly emotional.” After years of repressing emotions that were frowned upon, DBT helps clients start to better understand and trust their emotions and also to create healthier relationship patterns.

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Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) helps clients recognize how memories have influenced their beliefs about themselves and the world around them. Most of my clients grew up in a culture that taught that heterosexuality, monogamy, and the binary view of genders are “normal.” As a result, even as tiny kids, we queer folks had countless moments teaching us that we are “abnormal,” which can lead to feeling like we are unloveable, flawed, and alone.

I want you to know that you ARE loveable. We are all flawed, but not because of our sexual and gender identities. You are not alone. You are beautiful, and you are welcome at Red Willow.

By: Renee Fisher

Filed Under: Therapy Utah, LGBTQ+ or Gender Issues

CONTACT INFO

Phone

Salt Lake City: 385-313-0055

IOP: 385-202-5315

Address

1425 South 700 East, Suite #102 Salt Lake City, UT 84105

4516 S 700 E #260 Murray, UT 84107

1901 Prospector Ave #30 Park City, UT 84060

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